Hey, Sexy Women and Men Who Love Us (or will once they get it) -
Pearls of wisdom from 60 Minutes Correspondent Andy Rooney:
As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:
"A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, 'What are you thinking?' She doesn't care what you think.
If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting.
Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.
Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.
Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.
Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off you are a jerk if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.
Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize.
For all those men who say, 'Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?', here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!"
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Things I Forgot...
The Virginia election is over. It was consuming (for me, starting early 2009 when son Mike announced his bid for lt. gov.). It continues to dominate my thoughts (see http://virginianow.wordpress.com). But other things demand attention. So here, few and dear readers, they are:
Grandmotherhood is near (March), and where is a great place for a baby shower? And what about day care!!!???
A marriage (mine) ends after decades, quietly in the Wedgewood-blue Alexandria courthouse.
Love doesn't always look or feel like what we thought (or maybe it never does).
Abortion is a big issue in health care coverage. Will the Catholic bishops succeed in bullying Congress to exclude coverage for abortion - to codify the Hyde Amendment in law?
The NOW National Board struggles to keep it together in light of the election of new officers and differing ideas about what to do next. Younger feminists chafe at the attitudes of older fems - is this like a family meltdown, with daughters pissed at know-it-all mothers? Or is it not?
We learn (from the Shriver Report) that women are more than half the workforce - and we still don't have a family leave policy that makes sense (and what does the gut-wrenching stress of family-work demands do to marriages - and how does that relate to the high divorce rate?).
Turns out, yellow "summer" squash and zucchini can withstand near-freezing temperatures. Root vegetables like carrots and beets are fine throughout the winter but now I know I CAN garden above-ground into mid-November.
Sunshine and laughter are the best medicines.
We have to keep a close watch on the McDonnell administration!
Grandmotherhood is near (March), and where is a great place for a baby shower? And what about day care!!!???
A marriage (mine) ends after decades, quietly in the Wedgewood-blue Alexandria courthouse.
Love doesn't always look or feel like what we thought (or maybe it never does).
Abortion is a big issue in health care coverage. Will the Catholic bishops succeed in bullying Congress to exclude coverage for abortion - to codify the Hyde Amendment in law?
The NOW National Board struggles to keep it together in light of the election of new officers and differing ideas about what to do next. Younger feminists chafe at the attitudes of older fems - is this like a family meltdown, with daughters pissed at know-it-all mothers? Or is it not?
We learn (from the Shriver Report) that women are more than half the workforce - and we still don't have a family leave policy that makes sense (and what does the gut-wrenching stress of family-work demands do to marriages - and how does that relate to the high divorce rate?).
Turns out, yellow "summer" squash and zucchini can withstand near-freezing temperatures. Root vegetables like carrots and beets are fine throughout the winter but now I know I CAN garden above-ground into mid-November.
Sunshine and laughter are the best medicines.
We have to keep a close watch on the McDonnell administration!
Thursday, September 3, 2009
Breastfeeding - What's a Girl to Do?
Being in a room recently with two breastfeeding women - two gorgeous, glowing, healthy, happy moms - brought back memories of breastfeeding my own children. Not all warm and fuzzy. Cracked nipples (remedy: lanolin). Leaky boobs (remedy: get that babe sucking). Fear of falling asleep and crushing nursing baby (remedy: try to get more sleep?). At what age to stop (remedy: lots of people staring in disbelief). So it wasn't all milk and honey, although it was cheaper than canned formula, did seem to calm the colic, and aided in weight loss (mine). Didn't seem to affect the all-important breast shape much, either.
Some of the talk in that room was about the "normalcy" of breastfeeding. According to historians of the practice, it fluctuates, like the stock market - sometimes there's lots of women doing it, sometimes not. It's related to socioeconomic status, too - sometimes better off women favor it, sometimes poorer women do. Go figure.
A real shocker for me was a feminist friend who just had a baby - I asked if she was breastfeeding and she replied, "Do I look like a cow?" I thought for a feminist, breastfeeding would be natural. It's not. For this lady, who is devoted to her children, it's an imposition on her body and perhaps her life.
Breastfeeding has benefits. I fervently believe it contributes to lifelong health. I don't care what science says - or if it says anything at all (I have no idea.) It's nice to cuddle the baby, at least it was for me. I didn't have to hold up a bottle or prop one up (which I didn't like doing). I could doze off without fear. Less gas and burping than with a bottle. I didn't change my diet (although I didn't have a spicy diet to begin with). I never had to run out to buy more formula. I didn't have to buy anything - the milk was free (and how cool is that). I had two hands free (a bottle required using one hand).
Apparently contemporary disadvantages to breastfeeding (my children range from 25-36) include that many women are at work and can't spend so much time with their babies and that women want to have a life besides baby. For me, having a baby pretty much was a life. Breast pumps of course keep the whole breastfeeding enterprise flowing - or to be more accurate, they enable babies to have breast milk and mothers to have a job and a life.
And this was where the conversation in that room got interesting. Is it breast milk or breastfeeding that is important to baby and mom? I maintain you shouldn't separate them - except during the work day as necessary and occasional outings. But I'm out of step with the times, it seems. More young women consider the pump to be part of their breast - not an occasional respite or work-related necessity.
So many things are mechanized. Women's lives changed radically when automatic washers and driers became available - so, too, with frozen food and other labor-saving devices. And so, too, I guess, with the breast pump. Simpler - and removed from the human touch.
I prefer the old way, and I'm glad I did it and fortunate I could. I don't think it made me less of a feminist or disempowered me. I felt connected to something primal and universal - kind of earth mother-y. Feminine and a feminist. I think breastfeeding can make you happy.
(Note - One of the worst things that can be done to any woman is to make her feel guilty or unnatural or unfit because of her choices about how to give birth, whether to breastfeed, etc.)
Some of the talk in that room was about the "normalcy" of breastfeeding. According to historians of the practice, it fluctuates, like the stock market - sometimes there's lots of women doing it, sometimes not. It's related to socioeconomic status, too - sometimes better off women favor it, sometimes poorer women do. Go figure.
A real shocker for me was a feminist friend who just had a baby - I asked if she was breastfeeding and she replied, "Do I look like a cow?" I thought for a feminist, breastfeeding would be natural. It's not. For this lady, who is devoted to her children, it's an imposition on her body and perhaps her life.
Breastfeeding has benefits. I fervently believe it contributes to lifelong health. I don't care what science says - or if it says anything at all (I have no idea.) It's nice to cuddle the baby, at least it was for me. I didn't have to hold up a bottle or prop one up (which I didn't like doing). I could doze off without fear. Less gas and burping than with a bottle. I didn't change my diet (although I didn't have a spicy diet to begin with). I never had to run out to buy more formula. I didn't have to buy anything - the milk was free (and how cool is that). I had two hands free (a bottle required using one hand).
Apparently contemporary disadvantages to breastfeeding (my children range from 25-36) include that many women are at work and can't spend so much time with their babies and that women want to have a life besides baby. For me, having a baby pretty much was a life. Breast pumps of course keep the whole breastfeeding enterprise flowing - or to be more accurate, they enable babies to have breast milk and mothers to have a job and a life.
And this was where the conversation in that room got interesting. Is it breast milk or breastfeeding that is important to baby and mom? I maintain you shouldn't separate them - except during the work day as necessary and occasional outings. But I'm out of step with the times, it seems. More young women consider the pump to be part of their breast - not an occasional respite or work-related necessity.
So many things are mechanized. Women's lives changed radically when automatic washers and driers became available - so, too, with frozen food and other labor-saving devices. And so, too, I guess, with the breast pump. Simpler - and removed from the human touch.
I prefer the old way, and I'm glad I did it and fortunate I could. I don't think it made me less of a feminist or disempowered me. I felt connected to something primal and universal - kind of earth mother-y. Feminine and a feminist. I think breastfeeding can make you happy.
(Note - One of the worst things that can be done to any woman is to make her feel guilty or unnatural or unfit because of her choices about how to give birth, whether to breastfeed, etc.)
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Women Deserve Better Than Bob - Better Than Theocracy
Today's Washington Post (Sept. 2, page B 1-2) reports on my actions Sunday morning when I read the Post article about GOP gubernatorial candidate Bob McDonnell's "thesis." The Post said - correctly - I read the article at 11 am and was soon on my way to protest at a Women for McDonnell event in Fairfax, homemade poster in hand. (Just so you know - I also took a shower and had to pay $8 to get into that park.) They did not mention the insults and pushing and shoving of the pink tshirt-clad "Women for McDonnell" and one of their male companions to block my sign when the McDonnell van arrived. (And here I thought Republican women prided themselves on being lady-like.) Here's the article and the specific part about me:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/09/01/AR2009090103492.html?hpid=moreheadlines
"Countering McDonnell's efforts are those of women such as Arlington County resident Marjorie Signer, who serves as president of the Virginia chapter of the National Organization for Women. Signer said she read about McDonnell's thesis in the Washington Post at 11 a.m. Sunday and immediately left home to picket a Women for McDonnell rally at Lake Burke Park in Fairfax.
"Signer stood on the side of the road with a sign that read 'Women Deserve Better than Bob.'
'It is not a comfort to me that he has women in his staff or in leadership of his campaign or his daughters are working women,' she said. 'That is not comforting to me. I'm concerned about who he truly is in the sense of his worldview.'"
That image of me standing at the side of the road makes me seem like the lone, inevitably disshelved malcontents at the park by the White House, fighting for an obscure lost cause. Lesson: you talk to a reporter, you take your chances.
Nevertheless, they did quote me saying "worldview." What does that mean?
It helps to read the thesis
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/08/29/AR2009082902434.html . The whole thing. It's long.
About 5-8 pages in, I realized that this was a worldview consistent with that of theocratic Christians who want a religious state that abides by biblical principles (as they define them). I’ve done some research on this and also saw it in the Mark Earley campaign for governor, as well as in several other instances in Virginia. They are all consistent with Christian theocracy – which is hostile to modernity, pluralism, equal rights, women’s autonomy and of course hates homosexuality.
Reproductive rights is critical in this worldview because of the importance to Christian theocrats of male control of the family - and the state. Virginia has actually been a hotbed of Christian theocracy - and I'll be writing about that in future posts.
For now, it's sufficient to say that McDonnell is the antithesis of the freedom, equality and justice that NOW and our social justice allies stand for. He may have changed his opinion about a law or a specific policy position since he wrote his thesis but his worldview remains what it was - that of a Christian theocrat with a specific worldview based on biblical principles (as defined by theocrats) that put men at the head of the family and the state. Don't take my word for it - read the thesis. Anyone who believes in equality in any way should take this very seriously and should work to defeat McDonnell.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/09/01/AR2009090103492.html?hpid=moreheadlines
"Countering McDonnell's efforts are those of women such as Arlington County resident Marjorie Signer, who serves as president of the Virginia chapter of the National Organization for Women. Signer said she read about McDonnell's thesis in the Washington Post at 11 a.m. Sunday and immediately left home to picket a Women for McDonnell rally at Lake Burke Park in Fairfax.
"Signer stood on the side of the road with a sign that read 'Women Deserve Better than Bob.'
'It is not a comfort to me that he has women in his staff or in leadership of his campaign or his daughters are working women,' she said. 'That is not comforting to me. I'm concerned about who he truly is in the sense of his worldview.'"
That image of me standing at the side of the road makes me seem like the lone, inevitably disshelved malcontents at the park by the White House, fighting for an obscure lost cause. Lesson: you talk to a reporter, you take your chances.
Nevertheless, they did quote me saying "worldview." What does that mean?
It helps to read the thesis
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/08/29/AR2009082902434.html . The whole thing. It's long.
About 5-8 pages in, I realized that this was a worldview consistent with that of theocratic Christians who want a religious state that abides by biblical principles (as they define them). I’ve done some research on this and also saw it in the Mark Earley campaign for governor, as well as in several other instances in Virginia. They are all consistent with Christian theocracy – which is hostile to modernity, pluralism, equal rights, women’s autonomy and of course hates homosexuality.
Reproductive rights is critical in this worldview because of the importance to Christian theocrats of male control of the family - and the state. Virginia has actually been a hotbed of Christian theocracy - and I'll be writing about that in future posts.
For now, it's sufficient to say that McDonnell is the antithesis of the freedom, equality and justice that NOW and our social justice allies stand for. He may have changed his opinion about a law or a specific policy position since he wrote his thesis but his worldview remains what it was - that of a Christian theocrat with a specific worldview based on biblical principles (as defined by theocrats) that put men at the head of the family and the state. Don't take my word for it - read the thesis. Anyone who believes in equality in any way should take this very seriously and should work to defeat McDonnell.
Saturday, August 29, 2009
A Sabbath Prayer for Secularists
Amidah
Let these words
Of my mouth
Be sound
The creations
Of my heart
Be light
…Bless what forces us to invent
goodness every morning and what never frees
us from the cost of knowledge, which is
to act on what we know again and again.
All living are one and holy, let us remember
As we eat, as we work, as we walk and drive.
All living are one and holy, we must
make ourselves worthy.
We must act out justice and mercy and healing
as the sun rises and as the sun sets,
as the moon rises and the stars wheel above us,
we must repair goodness.
We will try to be holy,
We will try to repair the world given us to hand on.
Precious is this treasure of words and knowledge and deeds that moves inside us,
Holy is the hand that works for peace and for justice,
Holy is the mouth that speaks for goodness
holy is the foot that walks toward mercy.
Let us lift each other on our shoulders and carry each other along.
Let holiness move in us.
Let us pay attention to its small voice,
Let us see the light in others and honor that light.
Remember the dead who paid our way here dearly, dearly
and remember the unborn for whom we build our houses,
Praise the light that shines before us, through us, after us, Amen.
Marge Piercy
Let these words
Of my mouth
Be sound
The creations
Of my heart
Be light
…Bless what forces us to invent
goodness every morning and what never frees
us from the cost of knowledge, which is
to act on what we know again and again.
All living are one and holy, let us remember
As we eat, as we work, as we walk and drive.
All living are one and holy, we must
make ourselves worthy.
We must act out justice and mercy and healing
as the sun rises and as the sun sets,
as the moon rises and the stars wheel above us,
we must repair goodness.
We will try to be holy,
We will try to repair the world given us to hand on.
Precious is this treasure of words and knowledge and deeds that moves inside us,
Holy is the hand that works for peace and for justice,
Holy is the mouth that speaks for goodness
holy is the foot that walks toward mercy.
Let us lift each other on our shoulders and carry each other along.
Let holiness move in us.
Let us pay attention to its small voice,
Let us see the light in others and honor that light.
Remember the dead who paid our way here dearly, dearly
and remember the unborn for whom we build our houses,
Praise the light that shines before us, through us, after us, Amen.
Marge Piercy
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
The ERA Is BACK - and Baby, It Is Hot (Hopefully)!
My friends who are passionate about the Equal Rights Amendment are unyielding on the subject - we have to have it. I fear a backlash - no, I predict a backlash. Worse, I predict lack of interest, especially among young women who have no idea what it was like before the women's movement took on discrimination, harassment and all the other little things that demean women (we now call them sexism). [Does this mean I will be stripped of my feminist credentials?] On the other hand, I've seen people get really excited that it's back - even younger women, who haven't experience the kind of discrimination their mothers did but nevertheless get that it's crucial to have constitutional protection of all their rights. We might thank George W. Bush for showing them how bad it can get.
In solidarity and in trust of the judgment of those I respect (ie, Ellie Smeal and Virginia NOW women who fought so hard for the ERA in the 80s), I will do everything I can to support the ERA in Virginia - either the three-state strategy of picking up the remaining three states (including Virginia) needed to move the amendment to adoption or the new bill that was introduced July 21 to start all over.
This photo was taken at the press event to announce the new ERA bill, with Carolyn Maloney of NY presiding. Carolyn is a terrific advocate for women and her book is chock full of good information. Jerry Nadler and Sheila Jackson-Lee also gave a huge boost to the cause, although we need some moderate voices - please god, send us a Republican or two with feminist cred to get behind this bill. Terry O'Neill did a good job representing NOW - on her first day as national president. Many thanks to LuAnn Smith for taking photos.
In solidarity and in trust of the judgment of those I respect (ie, Ellie Smeal and Virginia NOW women who fought so hard for the ERA in the 80s), I will do everything I can to support the ERA in Virginia - either the three-state strategy of picking up the remaining three states (including Virginia) needed to move the amendment to adoption or the new bill that was introduced July 21 to start all over.
This photo was taken at the press event to announce the new ERA bill, with Carolyn Maloney of NY presiding. Carolyn is a terrific advocate for women and her book is chock full of good information. Jerry Nadler and Sheila Jackson-Lee also gave a huge boost to the cause, although we need some moderate voices - please god, send us a Republican or two with feminist cred to get behind this bill. Terry O'Neill did a good job representing NOW - on her first day as national president. Many thanks to LuAnn Smith for taking photos.
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Talking About Sex
We need more talk about sex. Funny coming from me - I never uttered the word vagina until I saw the Vagina Monologues in my 50s (which basically forced me to say it). Did I ever willingly talk about sex to my kids? I shuddered at sex-talk in movies. Clapped my hands over my ears. But once I started talking - relatively recently - it was easy to say all sorts of words that I hadn't said. (What's hard is trying not to get hung up on those words - italicized here. Gotta be an adult.)
A couple of things triggered these thoughts. One was the story the other day about the British goverment issuing a pamphlet recommending sex for teens and for older people as healthy, good exercise, fun. The British?? Exemplars of stiff upper lip. Another was watching the HBO series on John Adams on DVD - the sexual relationship that he and Abigail had was so happy. And they were so horny when they spent time apart. And the July 21 Politico story about those miserable hypocrites in the C Street "Christian fellowship" house - John Ensign, Zach Wamp - and their soulmates, Larry Craig, Mark Foley, David Vitter, Mark Sanford. And their upright enablers - Tom Coburn, Sam Brownback. What's the fellowship about, exactly? Protecting adulterers?
Mostly, though - and here's the feminist bit - it was reading Jessica Valenti's Full Frontal Feminism that did it. I'm reading this book to try to figure out what Third Wave feminists think. So far as I can tell, it's the same as Second Wave Feminism- but bolder, raunchier and definitely with lots more sex. And the more sex words she used, the more I got comfortable.
Jessica and Wave 2 share concerns about reproductive rights, workplace issues (pay and job equity), violence, gender stereotyping, outrageous physical excesses such as obsession with body image (make-up's ok if you like it), politics (get women elected and good men), global issues such as CEDAW, all that stuff NOW and Fem Majority hammer away at all the time. (Did I miss it - no mention of the Equal Rights Amendment. That would be a big departure from Wave 2.)
But Jessica is much more into sex. Major endorsement of masturbation as a sexual norm. Funny piece about words for masturbation. Major section on cultural perversions such as "Girls Gone Wild." Lesbian sex is fun to try, even if you're not lesbian. Feminism makes for better sex, she says - because feminists are into themselves and their bodies and feel (like men) that anything is good in search of an orgasm. (As an aside - this is funny - the mega-bestseller author Nora Roberts says, "a day without [French] fries is like a day without an orgasm.” Make of that what you will.)
Jessica says:
"Feminism tells you it's okay to make decisions about your sexuality for yourself." She also stresses - be responsible.
"And perhaps most important, feminism wants you to have fun. Sex isn't just about having babies after all, despite what young women are being taught."
And this: "Full frontal feminists make sure you can get off."
Now I may be wrong but I really can't recall a NOW conference where we talked about sex in that way, with such enthusiasm. But as I said, I can't recall - so it certainly could have happened before I got involved or I just could have missed it. There was one great Arlington NOW meeting around Valentine's Day where we did a great quiz about love and sex -very pro both. That was fun. But bitching about abortion rights and such isn't talking about sex.
So maybe in re-energizing and re-organizing NOW, we need to talk about sex. Have talk-about-sex parties. Have sex advisers. Share sex tips. Talk sex. Not abortion - not sex ed - SEX.
It would be fun. Like sex, fun is good for you!
A couple of things triggered these thoughts. One was the story the other day about the British goverment issuing a pamphlet recommending sex for teens and for older people as healthy, good exercise, fun. The British?? Exemplars of stiff upper lip. Another was watching the HBO series on John Adams on DVD - the sexual relationship that he and Abigail had was so happy. And they were so horny when they spent time apart. And the July 21 Politico story about those miserable hypocrites in the C Street "Christian fellowship" house - John Ensign, Zach Wamp - and their soulmates, Larry Craig, Mark Foley, David Vitter, Mark Sanford. And their upright enablers - Tom Coburn, Sam Brownback. What's the fellowship about, exactly? Protecting adulterers?
Mostly, though - and here's the feminist bit - it was reading Jessica Valenti's Full Frontal Feminism that did it. I'm reading this book to try to figure out what Third Wave feminists think. So far as I can tell, it's the same as Second Wave Feminism- but bolder, raunchier and definitely with lots more sex. And the more sex words she used, the more I got comfortable.
Jessica and Wave 2 share concerns about reproductive rights, workplace issues (pay and job equity), violence, gender stereotyping, outrageous physical excesses such as obsession with body image (make-up's ok if you like it), politics (get women elected and good men), global issues such as CEDAW, all that stuff NOW and Fem Majority hammer away at all the time. (Did I miss it - no mention of the Equal Rights Amendment. That would be a big departure from Wave 2.)
But Jessica is much more into sex. Major endorsement of masturbation as a sexual norm. Funny piece about words for masturbation. Major section on cultural perversions such as "Girls Gone Wild." Lesbian sex is fun to try, even if you're not lesbian. Feminism makes for better sex, she says - because feminists are into themselves and their bodies and feel (like men) that anything is good in search of an orgasm. (As an aside - this is funny - the mega-bestseller author Nora Roberts says, "a day without [French] fries is like a day without an orgasm.” Make of that what you will.)
Jessica says:
"Feminism tells you it's okay to make decisions about your sexuality for yourself." She also stresses - be responsible.
"And perhaps most important, feminism wants you to have fun. Sex isn't just about having babies after all, despite what young women are being taught."
And this: "Full frontal feminists make sure you can get off."
Now I may be wrong but I really can't recall a NOW conference where we talked about sex in that way, with such enthusiasm. But as I said, I can't recall - so it certainly could have happened before I got involved or I just could have missed it. There was one great Arlington NOW meeting around Valentine's Day where we did a great quiz about love and sex -very pro both. That was fun. But bitching about abortion rights and such isn't talking about sex.
So maybe in re-energizing and re-organizing NOW, we need to talk about sex. Have talk-about-sex parties. Have sex advisers. Share sex tips. Talk sex. Not abortion - not sex ed - SEX.
It would be fun. Like sex, fun is good for you!
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Thank you...
to people who leave comments. I'm thrilled - and flattered - you check out this blog. I'll try to post comment-worthy stuff, nothing trite, no party-lines be they political or social. Let me know what you think.
"Stand By Me"
I've listened to this about a thousand times. It doesn't get old. I love the dad dancing with his daughter, the old man, the stone-faced Moscow cellist, the intense Dutch calypso artist, the dreamily in-sync South Africans. Visualize the tune connecting us all. Feel the hope. (In case you think I'm losing my bitchy edge, as it were- why aren't there more women in this?) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Us-TVg40ExM
Sexist Joke of the Day
With thanks to the wonderful Paula of Martinsville for passing this on - and a profound thought - I have to be able to laugh at myself - how about you?
A 16-year-old boy came home with a new Chevrolet Avalanche and his parents began to yell and scream, 'Where did you get that truck???!!!' He calmly told them, 'I bought it today.' 'With what money?' demanded his parents. They knew what a Chevrolet Avalanche cost. 'Well,' said the boy, 'this one cost me just 15 dollars.'
So the parents began to yell even louder. 'Who would sell a truck like that for 15 dollars?' they said. 'It was the lady up the street,' said the boy. I don't know her name - they just moved in. She saw me ride past on my bike and asked me if I wanted to buy a Chevrolet Avalance for 15 dollars.'
'Oh my Goodness!,' moaned the mother, 'she must be a child abuser. Who knows what she will do next? John, you go right up there and see what's going on.' So the boy's father walked up the street to the house where the lady lived and found her out in the yard calmly planting petunias! He introduced himself as the father of the boy to whom she had sold a new Chevrolet Avalanche for 15 dollars and demanded to know why she did it.
'Well,' she said, 'this morning I got a phone call from my husband. (I thought he was on a business trip, but learned from a friend he had run off to Hawaii with his mistress and really doesn't intend to come back). He claimed he was stranded and needed cash, and asked me to sell his new Chevrolet Avalanche and send him the money. So I did.'
Are women good or what?
A 16-year-old boy came home with a new Chevrolet Avalanche and his parents began to yell and scream, 'Where did you get that truck???!!!' He calmly told them, 'I bought it today.' 'With what money?' demanded his parents. They knew what a Chevrolet Avalanche cost. 'Well,' said the boy, 'this one cost me just 15 dollars.'
So the parents began to yell even louder. 'Who would sell a truck like that for 15 dollars?' they said. 'It was the lady up the street,' said the boy. I don't know her name - they just moved in. She saw me ride past on my bike and asked me if I wanted to buy a Chevrolet Avalance for 15 dollars.'
'Oh my Goodness!,' moaned the mother, 'she must be a child abuser. Who knows what she will do next? John, you go right up there and see what's going on.' So the boy's father walked up the street to the house where the lady lived and found her out in the yard calmly planting petunias! He introduced himself as the father of the boy to whom she had sold a new Chevrolet Avalanche for 15 dollars and demanded to know why she did it.
'Well,' she said, 'this morning I got a phone call from my husband. (I thought he was on a business trip, but learned from a friend he had run off to Hawaii with his mistress and really doesn't intend to come back). He claimed he was stranded and needed cash, and asked me to sell his new Chevrolet Avalanche and send him the money. So I did.'
Are women good or what?
Friday, July 17, 2009
You Gotta Read This: "White Guy"
Now I get it! The world through Jeff Sessions' Eyes is...White Men. (Caveat - many people who are White and who are Men transcend that category.) Thank you, Rick Horowitz - White Guy with soul of a Human..no particular race or gender.
Published: Jul 16, 2009
How it looks to Jefferson Beauregard Sessions
BY RICK HOROWITZ
"I will not vote for, and no senator should vote for, an individual nominated by any president who believes it is acceptable for a judge to allow their personal background, gender, prejudices or sympathies to sway their decision in favor of or against parties before the court." -- Sen. Jeff Sessions,(R-Ala), at the Sonia Sotomayor hearings
I am truth. I am certainty. I am facts -- facts as they are, not as some might wish them to be. I am objectivity personified. I am White Guy.
Is this why I hated high school history - it was all about wars - which, far as I can tell, is what history was to the guys who wrote it (Howard Zinn excepted)?
When I see things, I see them clearly, and without distortion of any kind. I see all things, and hear all things, and I overlook nothing. I assign each thing I see, each thing I hear, the importance it deserves -- neither more nor less. My judgment in these matters isn't judgment at all -- it is the simple recognition of reality. Any judgment that differs from mine, to the extent it differs from mine, does not reflect reality. I am White Guy.
Is that why laws often don't make sense to me - they aren't for me and 'my kind' - non-Christian, non-male chauvinist, non-establishment?
My knowledge is total, and has no gaps. If there are things I seem not to know or fully comprehend, it is because these things are not worth knowing or comprehending. I have exactly the knowledge one should have, exactly the comprehension one should have, to make my way in the world. The rest is extraneous. I am White Guy.
Of course - that's why what we often suspect to be important and to need funding - reproductive health care, safe motherhood in Africa, shelters - isn't, or so we're told.
"Call it empathy, call it prejudice, or call it sympathy, but whatever it is, it's not law. In truth it's more akin to politics. And politics has no place in the courtroom." -- Sen. Sessions The rules and practices that appear to benefit me as White Guy are the only possible rules and practices. When I benefit from them, it is because I deserve to, by dint of dedication or hard work or innate talent. When others press for other rules and practices, it is only because they expect that somebody will cut them a break. This conclusion is too obvious to require further explanation. I am White Guy.
Clarence Thomas is White Guy, too.
Because I already know I have no prejudices, it would be a complete waste of time to consider the possibility that I might. Because I have no prejudices, I am confident that my judgments are the only possible judgments. My brain plays no tricks on me. Neither does my heart, or my gut. My experiences are universal experiences, and the lessons I take from those experiences are precisely the same lessons that any reasonable person would take. I am White Guy.
"This 'empathy standard' is another step down the road to a liberal, activist, result-oriented, relativist world where laws lose their fixed meaning, unelected judges set policy, Americans are seen as members of separate groups rather than simply Americans, and where the constitutional limits on government power are ignored when politicians want to buy out private companies." -- Sen. Sessions
"Empathy" is feeling what others feel. Since reasonable people in any circumstance feel exactly what I feel, I already know what others feel. Empathy is superfluous. So is sympathy. I am White Guy.
If laws did not lose their fixed meaning, slavery would be legal. That would probably not bother Sessions.
I hate when questions are raised about the way things are done -- especially when the way things are done is the way things have always been done. Instead of going down that dangerous road of complain and criticize, we should stick to our familiar path, and be thankful that the familiar path has been so helpful to so many of us for so long I have had it up to here with all the sore losers. I am White Guy.
Rick Horowitz is a syndicated columnist. Thank you to Robin Davis of North Carolina NOW for forwarding this from The News & Observer.
Published: Jul 16, 2009
How it looks to Jefferson Beauregard Sessions
BY RICK HOROWITZ
"I will not vote for, and no senator should vote for, an individual nominated by any president who believes it is acceptable for a judge to allow their personal background, gender, prejudices or sympathies to sway their decision in favor of or against parties before the court." -- Sen. Jeff Sessions,(R-Ala), at the Sonia Sotomayor hearings
I am truth. I am certainty. I am facts -- facts as they are, not as some might wish them to be. I am objectivity personified. I am White Guy.
Is this why I hated high school history - it was all about wars - which, far as I can tell, is what history was to the guys who wrote it (Howard Zinn excepted)?
When I see things, I see them clearly, and without distortion of any kind. I see all things, and hear all things, and I overlook nothing. I assign each thing I see, each thing I hear, the importance it deserves -- neither more nor less. My judgment in these matters isn't judgment at all -- it is the simple recognition of reality. Any judgment that differs from mine, to the extent it differs from mine, does not reflect reality. I am White Guy.
Is that why laws often don't make sense to me - they aren't for me and 'my kind' - non-Christian, non-male chauvinist, non-establishment?
My knowledge is total, and has no gaps. If there are things I seem not to know or fully comprehend, it is because these things are not worth knowing or comprehending. I have exactly the knowledge one should have, exactly the comprehension one should have, to make my way in the world. The rest is extraneous. I am White Guy.
Of course - that's why what we often suspect to be important and to need funding - reproductive health care, safe motherhood in Africa, shelters - isn't, or so we're told.
"Call it empathy, call it prejudice, or call it sympathy, but whatever it is, it's not law. In truth it's more akin to politics. And politics has no place in the courtroom." -- Sen. Sessions The rules and practices that appear to benefit me as White Guy are the only possible rules and practices. When I benefit from them, it is because I deserve to, by dint of dedication or hard work or innate talent. When others press for other rules and practices, it is only because they expect that somebody will cut them a break. This conclusion is too obvious to require further explanation. I am White Guy.
Clarence Thomas is White Guy, too.
Because I already know I have no prejudices, it would be a complete waste of time to consider the possibility that I might. Because I have no prejudices, I am confident that my judgments are the only possible judgments. My brain plays no tricks on me. Neither does my heart, or my gut. My experiences are universal experiences, and the lessons I take from those experiences are precisely the same lessons that any reasonable person would take. I am White Guy.
"This 'empathy standard' is another step down the road to a liberal, activist, result-oriented, relativist world where laws lose their fixed meaning, unelected judges set policy, Americans are seen as members of separate groups rather than simply Americans, and where the constitutional limits on government power are ignored when politicians want to buy out private companies." -- Sen. Sessions
"Empathy" is feeling what others feel. Since reasonable people in any circumstance feel exactly what I feel, I already know what others feel. Empathy is superfluous. So is sympathy. I am White Guy.
If laws did not lose their fixed meaning, slavery would be legal. That would probably not bother Sessions.
I hate when questions are raised about the way things are done -- especially when the way things are done is the way things have always been done. Instead of going down that dangerous road of complain and criticize, we should stick to our familiar path, and be thankful that the familiar path has been so helpful to so many of us for so long I have had it up to here with all the sore losers. I am White Guy.
Rick Horowitz is a syndicated columnist. Thank you to Robin Davis of North Carolina NOW for forwarding this from The News & Observer.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
"The Stoning of Soraya M."- Oppression Kills
I just saw the movie. I'm still a little shaky. It's horrific to see the stoning- and sickening to watch the evil unfold that leads to the stoning. The evil includes silence.
But first, let's dispose of the idiotic Washington Post review that called it "the worst kind of exploitive Hollywood melodrama, presented under the virtuous guise of moral outrage." The Post reviewer is a professional film-goer, not a normal viewer. Too bad for the reviewer. There were definitely weak points in the film but that was almost irrelevant, given the monstrous true story it tells. The story of how oppression kills, body and spirit.
Soraya is stoned to death because her cheating husband falsely accuses her of adultery (so he can get rid of her and marry a 14-year-old) and gets one other man to go along with the lie. The village mayor allows the sentence to be imposed, although he's ambivalent and hopes for a "divine" sign that he should stop it. That's the storyline. Now for the meaning - I think it's that oppression kills. Internalized oppression kills because it robs a person of the ability to act in his/her best interest - whether you are a Jew who stays in Hitler's Germany or an Iranian wife who refuses to leave a brutal, violent and ultimately murderous husband or a battered woman or man or a person in a destructive, demeaning job or relationship. You accept your oppression - you may even embrace it. After all, it's your life. The mayor also fell to oppression, but he didn't lose his life - only his soul.
To get away with torture and murder, at least in this case, you also need external oppression - laws and social/religious norms and economic conditions that make it acceptable - ordinary - to deny a person's humanity and degrade him/her. Soraya had no way out - this was her world. The ayatollahs and mullahs said it was so. Someone drew a chalk line around the pit where she was to be stoned to death and she marched into it - this was her world.
About two thirds of the way through the movie I found myself thinking - hell, why doesn't she get out? Run away? Why doesn't she grant him the divorce? [She had excuses - mainly, she and her two daughters would starve without her husband.] I bought into blaming-the-victim: more internalized oppression, on my part.
Victim - an inadequate description. Soraya fell prey to the most horrific excesses of dominance - religious, tribal, political, gender. The men who threw the stones the hardest - as she was tied up and trapped in a dirt pit and helpless to shield herself - were asserting their dominance. Pathetic cowards.
Soraya's murder justified and glorified the oppressive theocratic rule of the ayatollahs. No justice in this regime. Just revenge. And Soraya was an easy target. Besides - the villagers would say (men and women) - she deserved it. Soraya refused to be a "good" wife - refused to submit to the brutal physicality of her cheating husband.
The feminist take-home message is that society can quickly and easily strip you of your humanity if you do not play by the rules and do not have real power and real control. "Real" means you've internalized the values of equality and you have financial resources and political power - and the laws that make those possible. (Caveat - Even with power, we can still lose our rights unless we have a lot of friends in high places who care what we think and how we vote. Will the ERA change that?)
Real equality = real power.
See the movie (in Northern Virginia, it's at Shirlington right now - July 15th) and share your thoughts on this blog.
But first, let's dispose of the idiotic Washington Post review that called it "the worst kind of exploitive Hollywood melodrama, presented under the virtuous guise of moral outrage." The Post reviewer is a professional film-goer, not a normal viewer. Too bad for the reviewer. There were definitely weak points in the film but that was almost irrelevant, given the monstrous true story it tells. The story of how oppression kills, body and spirit.
Soraya is stoned to death because her cheating husband falsely accuses her of adultery (so he can get rid of her and marry a 14-year-old) and gets one other man to go along with the lie. The village mayor allows the sentence to be imposed, although he's ambivalent and hopes for a "divine" sign that he should stop it. That's the storyline. Now for the meaning - I think it's that oppression kills. Internalized oppression kills because it robs a person of the ability to act in his/her best interest - whether you are a Jew who stays in Hitler's Germany or an Iranian wife who refuses to leave a brutal, violent and ultimately murderous husband or a battered woman or man or a person in a destructive, demeaning job or relationship. You accept your oppression - you may even embrace it. After all, it's your life. The mayor also fell to oppression, but he didn't lose his life - only his soul.
To get away with torture and murder, at least in this case, you also need external oppression - laws and social/religious norms and economic conditions that make it acceptable - ordinary - to deny a person's humanity and degrade him/her. Soraya had no way out - this was her world. The ayatollahs and mullahs said it was so. Someone drew a chalk line around the pit where she was to be stoned to death and she marched into it - this was her world.
About two thirds of the way through the movie I found myself thinking - hell, why doesn't she get out? Run away? Why doesn't she grant him the divorce? [She had excuses - mainly, she and her two daughters would starve without her husband.] I bought into blaming-the-victim: more internalized oppression, on my part.
Victim - an inadequate description. Soraya fell prey to the most horrific excesses of dominance - religious, tribal, political, gender. The men who threw the stones the hardest - as she was tied up and trapped in a dirt pit and helpless to shield herself - were asserting their dominance. Pathetic cowards.
Soraya's murder justified and glorified the oppressive theocratic rule of the ayatollahs. No justice in this regime. Just revenge. And Soraya was an easy target. Besides - the villagers would say (men and women) - she deserved it. Soraya refused to be a "good" wife - refused to submit to the brutal physicality of her cheating husband.
The feminist take-home message is that society can quickly and easily strip you of your humanity if you do not play by the rules and do not have real power and real control. "Real" means you've internalized the values of equality and you have financial resources and political power - and the laws that make those possible. (Caveat - Even with power, we can still lose our rights unless we have a lot of friends in high places who care what we think and how we vote. Will the ERA change that?)
Real equality = real power.
See the movie (in Northern Virginia, it's at Shirlington right now - July 15th) and share your thoughts on this blog.
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Getting Older
Farrah Fawcett was 62. Young, to me. Michael Jackson - - really young. I'm 66 and I'm an ageist. It's like being a sexist in that I make assumptions about people because of their age (just so I'm not being confusing - not because of their sex or gender). Very narrow-minded, I know.
I'm surrounded by people in their 20s, 30s and 40s. At work, at home, in various activities, they're all young. They talk "facebook" - I don't understand most of the abbreviated lingo, let alone what people are saying when they tweet. I struggle, still, with computers. Adding phone numbers to my BlackBerry- can't figure it out. And just what is the difference between CDs and DVDs. I still use an actual film camera - but I'm getting ready to buy a digital camera.
Anyone remember carbon copies - real ones, made with carbon paper in typewriters - that's BEFORE Xerox and photocopying, before faxing, before emails. I know this is boring to talk about, but it's also amazing how some things change so quickly. But we still send our children to die in wars, so some things don't change. And we still fall passionately, madly in love.
I used to look younger than my years - and looking youthful has become my final vanity (unless there's something else to be vain about that I don't know). But lately, I feel old. My muscles and joints ache and I have wrinkles and am starting to get those jiggling arms and chest wrinkles. (This is more than anyone needs to know.)
You're wasting your time if you are vain about physical attributes - whatever, great upper arms, great abs, beautiful hair - they'll all go. You're wasting your time if you are vain about accomplishments - someone else will best you, someone else is smarter and wiser and - here's the really annoying thing - more modest, humane, compassionate, good. And then your memory goes and you're not so smart anymore, either.
I never watched Charley's Angels (ok - maybe once) but I'll miss Farrah. She was so vulnerable, I guess like Marilyn Monroe. I wish Farrah had married Ryan. Michael Jackson was a fantastic performer - but I won't miss him. We have lots of film of him doing the Moonwalk. But I'll miss all the years that are gone. Mostly, though, I'm glad for all the days that are left - and curious about what bizarre, amazing, brilliant, soul-expanding thing will happen next and next and next.
RIP, Farrah. And Michael.
I'm surrounded by people in their 20s, 30s and 40s. At work, at home, in various activities, they're all young. They talk "facebook" - I don't understand most of the abbreviated lingo, let alone what people are saying when they tweet. I struggle, still, with computers. Adding phone numbers to my BlackBerry- can't figure it out. And just what is the difference between CDs and DVDs. I still use an actual film camera - but I'm getting ready to buy a digital camera.
Anyone remember carbon copies - real ones, made with carbon paper in typewriters - that's BEFORE Xerox and photocopying, before faxing, before emails. I know this is boring to talk about, but it's also amazing how some things change so quickly. But we still send our children to die in wars, so some things don't change. And we still fall passionately, madly in love.
I used to look younger than my years - and looking youthful has become my final vanity (unless there's something else to be vain about that I don't know). But lately, I feel old. My muscles and joints ache and I have wrinkles and am starting to get those jiggling arms and chest wrinkles. (This is more than anyone needs to know.)
You're wasting your time if you are vain about physical attributes - whatever, great upper arms, great abs, beautiful hair - they'll all go. You're wasting your time if you are vain about accomplishments - someone else will best you, someone else is smarter and wiser and - here's the really annoying thing - more modest, humane, compassionate, good. And then your memory goes and you're not so smart anymore, either.
I never watched Charley's Angels (ok - maybe once) but I'll miss Farrah. She was so vulnerable, I guess like Marilyn Monroe. I wish Farrah had married Ryan. Michael Jackson was a fantastic performer - but I won't miss him. We have lots of film of him doing the Moonwalk. But I'll miss all the years that are gone. Mostly, though, I'm glad for all the days that are left - and curious about what bizarre, amazing, brilliant, soul-expanding thing will happen next and next and next.
RIP, Farrah. And Michael.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
In the Hot Tub
At the NOW conference, I went to the hotel hot tub one evening to relax and there met a woman - I'll call her Sue - who gave me a lot to think about.
Sue is a care provider for a young man who was at the hotel for the Power Soccer tournament (this is a tournament for athletes who use a wheelchair). He had been deprived of oxygen as an infant and as a result has very little ability to control his body or talk. Sue said he is bright, sociable, and once had a girlfriend and wanted to have a relationship again.
But this is Sue's story...
Sue asked me why I was at the hotel and then asked me what NOW does. I gave her the "brochure" speech - oldest and largest women's organization, with six issue areas. She immediately told me her story, wondering if I could help in some way.
Sue has allowed a woman (aged about 20-21) - I'll call her Joan - to stay in the 2 bedroom apartment she shares with her husband and her young son. Sue had worked briefly with Joan at a grocery store. One day, Sue was driving and saw Joan on the street with her baby. Joan and the baby had just been thrown out of the place where they were staying, apparently because of an ongoing conflict with the family whose home it is.
Sue took Joan to her home and there Joan has been since - about 10 months now. Joan receives a small amount of assistance ($600/month) and has food stamps; she has had some government help in a job search. She has no family in the area and doesn't know where the baby's father is. Sue has helped in every way possible - looked for appropriate jobs (Joan has administrative skills so at least theoretically could find a job, although this market makes it all the harder), looked for affordable housing, offered to take the baby when Joan went for a job interview, found a free parenting class for Joan, and more and more. She takes no rent from Joan. Joan is reluctant to look for a job. She spends many days shopping. Sue thought they could work something out if Joan watched her son (especially as Joan was already watching her own baby) but that fell apart quickly when he was found wandering outside while Joan slept on the couch. I suggested Joan was depressed and needed medical attention, but Sue didn't think that was the case. Apparently, Joan doesn't think she needs such assistance either.
I tried to articulate a NOW "perspective" - meaning, to talk about the damage done by welfare "reform," how we needed more job training, better supports for women, etc. I talked about how we needed to change the structure...about economic justice, the fault being with society, etc.
Honestly, it sounded pretty weak to me as I said it.
Here is a compassionate, smart, hard-working woman - Sue - who has a problem that all of NOW's fine words and legal arguments cannot do anything about - at least not in the present or near future. And another woman - Joan - who is stuck in inertia, refusing to take control of her own life.
I tried pop-psychology - saying this was Joan's problem, not Sue's. But Sue doesn't want to put a baby in the street. Period. Sue and her husband tried several times to lay down an ultimatum to Joan - find a place and move out by such-and-so date - but Joan just continued her life, sleeping on the living room couch. She doesn't have a key - she climbs in through a back crawl space when Sue isn't there.
Sue's going to try the ultimatum route again - telling Joan she has to leave by a certain date - and she's also going to close up the crawl space.
So this is the real-life situation of two women who - I fear - NOW cannot help. At the conference, we fought over who should run the organization for the next four years. We had spirited discussion over the state of NOW and (according to press reports) whether we should focus on activism or lobbying. We asked ourselves, who would be better for NOW.
I know it matters who runs the organization. But it matters more what we can do for women. I think we would be stronger and more relevant if we focused on real-life facts - such as the situation of Sue and Joan and all the other women in need and at risk - rather than fight over who to blame for our internal problems. No, I don't mean we should provide social welfare services. I mean we should be real. To be real, we need to hear more from Sue and Joan - and less from policy people, our own activists (who all seem to have jobs), and super-privileged women who have nothing better to do than go to Democratic Party confabs and bitch about how the party has sold them out.
I'd love to hear comments.
Sue is a care provider for a young man who was at the hotel for the Power Soccer tournament (this is a tournament for athletes who use a wheelchair). He had been deprived of oxygen as an infant and as a result has very little ability to control his body or talk. Sue said he is bright, sociable, and once had a girlfriend and wanted to have a relationship again.
But this is Sue's story...
Sue asked me why I was at the hotel and then asked me what NOW does. I gave her the "brochure" speech - oldest and largest women's organization, with six issue areas. She immediately told me her story, wondering if I could help in some way.
Sue has allowed a woman (aged about 20-21) - I'll call her Joan - to stay in the 2 bedroom apartment she shares with her husband and her young son. Sue had worked briefly with Joan at a grocery store. One day, Sue was driving and saw Joan on the street with her baby. Joan and the baby had just been thrown out of the place where they were staying, apparently because of an ongoing conflict with the family whose home it is.
Sue took Joan to her home and there Joan has been since - about 10 months now. Joan receives a small amount of assistance ($600/month) and has food stamps; she has had some government help in a job search. She has no family in the area and doesn't know where the baby's father is. Sue has helped in every way possible - looked for appropriate jobs (Joan has administrative skills so at least theoretically could find a job, although this market makes it all the harder), looked for affordable housing, offered to take the baby when Joan went for a job interview, found a free parenting class for Joan, and more and more. She takes no rent from Joan. Joan is reluctant to look for a job. She spends many days shopping. Sue thought they could work something out if Joan watched her son (especially as Joan was already watching her own baby) but that fell apart quickly when he was found wandering outside while Joan slept on the couch. I suggested Joan was depressed and needed medical attention, but Sue didn't think that was the case. Apparently, Joan doesn't think she needs such assistance either.
I tried to articulate a NOW "perspective" - meaning, to talk about the damage done by welfare "reform," how we needed more job training, better supports for women, etc. I talked about how we needed to change the structure...about economic justice, the fault being with society, etc.
Honestly, it sounded pretty weak to me as I said it.
Here is a compassionate, smart, hard-working woman - Sue - who has a problem that all of NOW's fine words and legal arguments cannot do anything about - at least not in the present or near future. And another woman - Joan - who is stuck in inertia, refusing to take control of her own life.
I tried pop-psychology - saying this was Joan's problem, not Sue's. But Sue doesn't want to put a baby in the street. Period. Sue and her husband tried several times to lay down an ultimatum to Joan - find a place and move out by such-and-so date - but Joan just continued her life, sleeping on the living room couch. She doesn't have a key - she climbs in through a back crawl space when Sue isn't there.
Sue's going to try the ultimatum route again - telling Joan she has to leave by a certain date - and she's also going to close up the crawl space.
So this is the real-life situation of two women who - I fear - NOW cannot help. At the conference, we fought over who should run the organization for the next four years. We had spirited discussion over the state of NOW and (according to press reports) whether we should focus on activism or lobbying. We asked ourselves, who would be better for NOW.
I know it matters who runs the organization. But it matters more what we can do for women. I think we would be stronger and more relevant if we focused on real-life facts - such as the situation of Sue and Joan and all the other women in need and at risk - rather than fight over who to blame for our internal problems. No, I don't mean we should provide social welfare services. I mean we should be real. To be real, we need to hear more from Sue and Joan - and less from policy people, our own activists (who all seem to have jobs), and super-privileged women who have nothing better to do than go to Democratic Party confabs and bitch about how the party has sold them out.
I'd love to hear comments.
Comment on NOW National Election Post
Besides the foolish defensiveness from PUMAs who really believe that voting Republican was the best way to get back at Obama (did they vote for Ralph nader, too?), there was a sensible comment, which I'd like to share:
"I think it's really interesting to see how inter-group politics can take up so much energy and time, which could be used toward working for the organization's goals. Seems like there's need for a new system of leadership, which promotes solidarity instead of divisiveness. Thanks for providing this account so people can learn about the inner workings!"
To the person who suggested that if I really cared about NOW I would be quiet about what happened at the conference, I say:
I think it's critical to talk about what happened. How else will we understand each other?
"I think it's really interesting to see how inter-group politics can take up so much energy and time, which could be used toward working for the organization's goals. Seems like there's need for a new system of leadership, which promotes solidarity instead of divisiveness. Thanks for providing this account so people can learn about the inner workings!"
To the person who suggested that if I really cared about NOW I would be quiet about what happened at the conference, I say:
I think it's critical to talk about what happened. How else will we understand each other?
Update: Planes, Trains, & Attack-Dog Feminism
Note - there are a few factual changes and some explanatory info is added
Landing at National after 5 days at the NOW conference in Indianapolis, I decided to save a few dollars and took Metro home. Blue line to orange line, then a bus. Smooth and fast, while elsewhere on the red line, people were mangled and dying. So arbitrary - you're on one line, you live; another, you don't.
Anyone who thinks that because they've planned and worked and saved and been good citizens and good parents, they and the ones they love are safe - is in a dreamworld. Life doesn't make sense.
For example, all of those who thought the "dream team" of Latifa Lyles, etc., would win the NOW presidency and vice-presidencies...because we needed a youthful, fresh face for the aging, tired women's movement...were wrong. Eight votes - that's all it took for Latifa, a woman of color in her early thirties, to lose to Terry O'Neill, a mid-50s white woman. (Race does matter - a lot - in the women's movement.) Terry and her team may succeed in turning NOW around - I hope so - but I'm worried. There's nothing fresh there. Policy ideas are stale and positions are delivered in a rote, scripted fashion. The veterans on the ticket - Terry and the Illinois NOW prez - do not inspire me in terms of vision or practical skills or ability to deliver. The "new" faces on the ticket - two women in their late 20s, early 30s - have a lot to learn. A lot.
Eight votes. The red line.
A few people have asked me to write more about the NOW elections. Both teams - Latifa Lyles and Terry O'Neill - had strengths and weaknesses. But it's not about ideals or visions or even skills - it's about who can turn out the most voters. Total numbers of voters - 404 (really). [There were more people than that at the conference - but 407 were credentialed to vote and 404 voted. You must be a member for a certain period in advance of the conference to vote.] Late Saturday, people were coming in from California to vote for Terry - she was supported by a woman named Shelly Mandell of Los Angeles, who supported McCain-Palin publicly after Hillary lost the nomination. Shelly says she didn't support McCain-Palin as a NOW person - but the press thought otherwise.
Because this is the women's movement, we want to build a feminist culture. Not just win votes or elections or pass bills, but empower women - and men - to think and behave with equality and for justice.
Really! The people who won were nasty. I wish I had been in the plenary when the vaunted Patricia Ireland (Terry's treasurer) lashed out at Kim Gandy, questioning her budget figures - while supporters of the Terry team lined the back of the room, shouting at Kim to "tell the truth" - in reference to the budget situation. (I was working on credentialling so wasn't in the plenary.) Financially, NOW is in bad shape. So we have reason to be worried. But is this feminism? Perhaps this is a new version - attack-dog feminism. How does that distinguish us from every other political group? It doesn't.
The anger and bitterness of this crew - desperate to hang on to power, refusing to believe anyone else could run the organization - was shocking. (You've got to remember - these folks have a lot of history together - they're like Chicago politicos - byzantine alliances - cross them at your peril.) There were people I like and respect on Terry's side - people who felt she had the brains and experience to turn the membership decline around and that Latifa was just not ready for prime time. But they didn't sway many voters (although granted, Terry was only in the race about 3-4 weeks!) - all they did was win by eight votes. And what the hell were they doing in the past eight years to stop the hemorrhaging of members and money - or - as one Terry supporter said - the "death throes" that NOW is in? Come to think of it - what was the person who said "death throes" doing during the past eight years?
In addition to PI (as Ireland is known), another vaunted figure - Carol Moseley-Braun - embarrassed herself by storming down the aisle and interrupting Kim's "farewell" remarks. Apparently she thought she had been labelled as anti-Obama and pro-Sarah Palin and that was just too much for her. But did she have to interrupt the NOW president of eight years to make her irate and (as it turned out, incorrect) statement?
Ireland and Moseley-Braun both apologized on Saturday for their outbursts. Ireland admitted it was the wrong way to behave at a NOW conference - it would have been ok to be rude and disruptive, she said, at a congressional hearing on the ERA (maybe that's what's wrong with NOW - its obnoxious outbursts) but not at a NOW conference. Mosely-Braun said she had misunderstood what people were saying about her. Now she's a person who served in the Senate and was an ambassador - is she really that confused?
That wasn't all - there also was the sideshow of the Hillary Clinton supporters who remain permanently (apparently) pissed off about her loss. The so-called "PUMAS" - Party Unity My Ass. Clinton seems to have gotten over it - why haven't they. Some of these ladies are angry at NOW for not being supportive of Sarah Palin; apparently, the fact that she's a woman is sufficient qualification. A few blame Kim Gandy for EVERYTHING they don't like. I'd dismiss them as idiots except they are contributing to the anger within the women's movement and the splintering of the women's movement and they are very good at getting publicity.
It's too soon to tell whether younger feminists - those who were crying over Latifa's loss- will leave NOW and find another organization...or get over it... or take up the guitar, yoga, meditate, whatever. As for me, an "older feminist," probably the best thing I can do at the national level is be an active board member for the remainder of my term (over in Nov. 2010) and be watchful as to what the new officers do.
Will they keep their promises? Will they be transparent? Will they find something new to say and do? Will they lead?
Who cares? With only 404 voters in this "watershed" election to guide the women's movement, there doesn't seem to be a lot of enthusiasm or interest in NOW, I fear.
As for our state chapter, I think Virginia NOW has a lot of promise and can do a lot of good work - members are supportive and caring and good people. So if anyone reading this wants a progressive, feminist "home," Virginia NOW is that.
Landing at National after 5 days at the NOW conference in Indianapolis, I decided to save a few dollars and took Metro home. Blue line to orange line, then a bus. Smooth and fast, while elsewhere on the red line, people were mangled and dying. So arbitrary - you're on one line, you live; another, you don't.
Anyone who thinks that because they've planned and worked and saved and been good citizens and good parents, they and the ones they love are safe - is in a dreamworld. Life doesn't make sense.
For example, all of those who thought the "dream team" of Latifa Lyles, etc., would win the NOW presidency and vice-presidencies...because we needed a youthful, fresh face for the aging, tired women's movement...were wrong. Eight votes - that's all it took for Latifa, a woman of color in her early thirties, to lose to Terry O'Neill, a mid-50s white woman. (Race does matter - a lot - in the women's movement.) Terry and her team may succeed in turning NOW around - I hope so - but I'm worried. There's nothing fresh there. Policy ideas are stale and positions are delivered in a rote, scripted fashion. The veterans on the ticket - Terry and the Illinois NOW prez - do not inspire me in terms of vision or practical skills or ability to deliver. The "new" faces on the ticket - two women in their late 20s, early 30s - have a lot to learn. A lot.
Eight votes. The red line.
A few people have asked me to write more about the NOW elections. Both teams - Latifa Lyles and Terry O'Neill - had strengths and weaknesses. But it's not about ideals or visions or even skills - it's about who can turn out the most voters. Total numbers of voters - 404 (really). [There were more people than that at the conference - but 407 were credentialed to vote and 404 voted. You must be a member for a certain period in advance of the conference to vote.] Late Saturday, people were coming in from California to vote for Terry - she was supported by a woman named Shelly Mandell of Los Angeles, who supported McCain-Palin publicly after Hillary lost the nomination. Shelly says she didn't support McCain-Palin as a NOW person - but the press thought otherwise.
Because this is the women's movement, we want to build a feminist culture. Not just win votes or elections or pass bills, but empower women - and men - to think and behave with equality and for justice.
Really! The people who won were nasty. I wish I had been in the plenary when the vaunted Patricia Ireland (Terry's treasurer) lashed out at Kim Gandy, questioning her budget figures - while supporters of the Terry team lined the back of the room, shouting at Kim to "tell the truth" - in reference to the budget situation. (I was working on credentialling so wasn't in the plenary.) Financially, NOW is in bad shape. So we have reason to be worried. But is this feminism? Perhaps this is a new version - attack-dog feminism. How does that distinguish us from every other political group? It doesn't.
The anger and bitterness of this crew - desperate to hang on to power, refusing to believe anyone else could run the organization - was shocking. (You've got to remember - these folks have a lot of history together - they're like Chicago politicos - byzantine alliances - cross them at your peril.) There were people I like and respect on Terry's side - people who felt she had the brains and experience to turn the membership decline around and that Latifa was just not ready for prime time. But they didn't sway many voters (although granted, Terry was only in the race about 3-4 weeks!) - all they did was win by eight votes. And what the hell were they doing in the past eight years to stop the hemorrhaging of members and money - or - as one Terry supporter said - the "death throes" that NOW is in? Come to think of it - what was the person who said "death throes" doing during the past eight years?
In addition to PI (as Ireland is known), another vaunted figure - Carol Moseley-Braun - embarrassed herself by storming down the aisle and interrupting Kim's "farewell" remarks. Apparently she thought she had been labelled as anti-Obama and pro-Sarah Palin and that was just too much for her. But did she have to interrupt the NOW president of eight years to make her irate and (as it turned out, incorrect) statement?
Ireland and Moseley-Braun both apologized on Saturday for their outbursts. Ireland admitted it was the wrong way to behave at a NOW conference - it would have been ok to be rude and disruptive, she said, at a congressional hearing on the ERA (maybe that's what's wrong with NOW - its obnoxious outbursts) but not at a NOW conference. Mosely-Braun said she had misunderstood what people were saying about her. Now she's a person who served in the Senate and was an ambassador - is she really that confused?
That wasn't all - there also was the sideshow of the Hillary Clinton supporters who remain permanently (apparently) pissed off about her loss. The so-called "PUMAS" - Party Unity My Ass. Clinton seems to have gotten over it - why haven't they. Some of these ladies are angry at NOW for not being supportive of Sarah Palin; apparently, the fact that she's a woman is sufficient qualification. A few blame Kim Gandy for EVERYTHING they don't like. I'd dismiss them as idiots except they are contributing to the anger within the women's movement and the splintering of the women's movement and they are very good at getting publicity.
It's too soon to tell whether younger feminists - those who were crying over Latifa's loss- will leave NOW and find another organization...or get over it... or take up the guitar, yoga, meditate, whatever. As for me, an "older feminist," probably the best thing I can do at the national level is be an active board member for the remainder of my term (over in Nov. 2010) and be watchful as to what the new officers do.
Will they keep their promises? Will they be transparent? Will they find something new to say and do? Will they lead?
Who cares? With only 404 voters in this "watershed" election to guide the women's movement, there doesn't seem to be a lot of enthusiasm or interest in NOW, I fear.
As for our state chapter, I think Virginia NOW has a lot of promise and can do a lot of good work - members are supportive and caring and good people. So if anyone reading this wants a progressive, feminist "home," Virginia NOW is that.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
VA Women's Prison Segregated Lesbians
In March, I visited a women's prison- actually, a "pre-release center" - for Women's History Month, with a Virginia NOW colleague, at the invitation of a social worker there, who is a feminist. We spoke with a group of about 25 women who were about to be released - mainly women in jail on drug charges or for minor property crimes (theft, forgery). I don't think any were violent. My impression was most of the drug charges were for possession or use - although one woman was a "drug czar," who apparently ran a sizeable and lucrative business. Sad, sad business - a waste of lives and an indictment of our failure to deal with drug trafficking and to provide services to help women deal with issues and problems BEFORE they get in trouble. Apparently, recidivism is very high - so jailing troubled women sure isn't working. Let alone what it does to their children and families.
One of the saddest stories was a younger woman with a clearly masculine "style" - short, slick hair, rolled up tshirt sleeve, that stereotypical butch look - yet her speech was soft and her demeanor was kind and friendly. She told the same story as this AP article does - she was targeted because of her masculine appearance and segregated. I don't know enough about her - or any of the other inmates we spoke with - to say if she should have been segregated but it sure as hell isn't legitimate to isolate her because of her appearance.
I left the facility wanting to do something for these women. Maybe that's just liberal guilt - "there but for the grace of God go I." I don't know what that something should be. I do know the women I met by and large deserve better.
Va. women's prison segregated lesbians, others
By DENA POTTER, Associated Press Writer, Wed Jun 10, 7:05 pm ET
TROY, Va. – For more than a year, Virginia's largest women's prison rounded up inmates who had loose-fitting clothes, short hair or otherwise masculine looks, sending them to a unit officers derisively dubbed the "butch wing," prisoners and guards say.
Dozens were moved in an attempt to split up relationships and curb illegal sexual activity at the 1,200-inmate Fluvanna Correctional Center for Women, though some straight women were sent to the wing strictly because of their appearance, the inmates and corrections officers said.
Civil rights advocates called the moves unconstitutional punishment for "looking gay." The warden denied that any housing decisions were made based on looks or sexual orientation, and said doing so would be discriminatory. The practice was stopped recently after the Associated Press began questioning it, according to several inmates and one current employee.
Two current guards and one of their former co-workers said targeting masculine-looking inmates was a deliberate strategy by a building manager. Numerous inmates said in letters and interviews that they felt humiliated and stigmatized when guards took them to the separate wing — also referred to by prisoners and guards as the "little boys wing," "locker room wing" or "studs wing."
"I deserved to go for my crime and I did my time there," said Summer Triolo, who spent nearly six years at Fluvanna for theft before being released in February 2008. "But my punishment was by the judge to do time in prison away from my family and home. That was my punishment, not all the extra stuff."
Living conditions in wing 5D weren't worse than the rest of the prison, and no prisoner said she was denied services other inmates received. However, the women said they were verbally harassed by staff who would make remarks such as, "Here come the little boys," when they were escorted to eat, and they were taken to the cafeteria first or last to keep them away from other inmates. The three guards confirmed such remarks were made.
The two current guards and former guard William Drumheller said Building 5 manager Timothy Back, who is in charge of security and operations for that area, came up with the idea to break up couples by sending inmates to the wing. Gradually, they said, the 60-inmate wing was filled with women targeted because of their appearance. The current employees asked to remain anonymous for fear of losing their jobs.
"I heard him say, 'We're going to break up some of these relationships, start a boys wing, and we're going to take all these studs and put them together and see how they like looking at nothing but each other all day instead of their girlfriends,'" Drumheller said.
Drumheller said Back told him the plan one day in a prison office. The other two guards, who are both female, said Back's reasons for moving the prisoners were commonly known among guards, though officials would deny the reasons for the moves if inmates asked or complained.
Warden Barbara Wheeler called the policy a figment of the inmates' imaginations.
"With female offenders, relationships are very important, and often times when they're separated from those relationships they might perceive it as punitive," Wheeler said.
Wheeler said her employees wouldn't segregate inmates based on looks or sexual orientation, and she wouldn't condone it.
"That's like saying I want to put all the blacks in one unit and all the whites in one unit," something federal courts have ruled illegal, she said.
A dozen inmates interviewed in person or by letter contradicted Wheeler, saying there's no doubt why they were moved. Triolo said she had gone four years without getting in trouble until she shaved her shoulder-length brown locks. She soon was moved to 5D, away from her girlfriend.
Triolo and Trina O'Neal were two of the first inmates sent to 5D in the fall of 2007.
"I have been gay all my life and never have I once felt as degraded, humiliated or questioned my own sexuality, the way I look, etc., until all of this happened," O'Neal, 33, who is serving time for forgery and drug charges, wrote to the AP.
Drumheller worked at Fluvanna for two years but said he quit in August because he didn't like the inmates' treatment.
The prison declined repeated requests for an interview with Back, and the AP could not find a working home telephone number for him.
Sex — whether forced, coerced or consensual — is forbidden in prisons primarily to prevent violence and the spread of diseases.
Segregating gay inmates in men's prison has been upheld by federal courts to protect them and maintain order, though courts have ruled against total isolation or harsher conditions.
Separating women based on appearance, though, violates the Constitution's guarantees of equal protection and freedom of expression, said Helen Trainor, director of the Virginia Institutionalized Persons Project.
"Point blank, this institution is ran by homophobes, and the rules instated here are based on your sexual preference not what is right or wrong," wrote inmate Casey Lynn Toney.
One of the saddest stories was a younger woman with a clearly masculine "style" - short, slick hair, rolled up tshirt sleeve, that stereotypical butch look - yet her speech was soft and her demeanor was kind and friendly. She told the same story as this AP article does - she was targeted because of her masculine appearance and segregated. I don't know enough about her - or any of the other inmates we spoke with - to say if she should have been segregated but it sure as hell isn't legitimate to isolate her because of her appearance.
I left the facility wanting to do something for these women. Maybe that's just liberal guilt - "there but for the grace of God go I." I don't know what that something should be. I do know the women I met by and large deserve better.
Va. women's prison segregated lesbians, others
By DENA POTTER, Associated Press Writer, Wed Jun 10, 7:05 pm ET
TROY, Va. – For more than a year, Virginia's largest women's prison rounded up inmates who had loose-fitting clothes, short hair or otherwise masculine looks, sending them to a unit officers derisively dubbed the "butch wing," prisoners and guards say.
Dozens were moved in an attempt to split up relationships and curb illegal sexual activity at the 1,200-inmate Fluvanna Correctional Center for Women, though some straight women were sent to the wing strictly because of their appearance, the inmates and corrections officers said.
Civil rights advocates called the moves unconstitutional punishment for "looking gay." The warden denied that any housing decisions were made based on looks or sexual orientation, and said doing so would be discriminatory. The practice was stopped recently after the Associated Press began questioning it, according to several inmates and one current employee.
Two current guards and one of their former co-workers said targeting masculine-looking inmates was a deliberate strategy by a building manager. Numerous inmates said in letters and interviews that they felt humiliated and stigmatized when guards took them to the separate wing — also referred to by prisoners and guards as the "little boys wing," "locker room wing" or "studs wing."
"I deserved to go for my crime and I did my time there," said Summer Triolo, who spent nearly six years at Fluvanna for theft before being released in February 2008. "But my punishment was by the judge to do time in prison away from my family and home. That was my punishment, not all the extra stuff."
Living conditions in wing 5D weren't worse than the rest of the prison, and no prisoner said she was denied services other inmates received. However, the women said they were verbally harassed by staff who would make remarks such as, "Here come the little boys," when they were escorted to eat, and they were taken to the cafeteria first or last to keep them away from other inmates. The three guards confirmed such remarks were made.
The two current guards and former guard William Drumheller said Building 5 manager Timothy Back, who is in charge of security and operations for that area, came up with the idea to break up couples by sending inmates to the wing. Gradually, they said, the 60-inmate wing was filled with women targeted because of their appearance. The current employees asked to remain anonymous for fear of losing their jobs.
"I heard him say, 'We're going to break up some of these relationships, start a boys wing, and we're going to take all these studs and put them together and see how they like looking at nothing but each other all day instead of their girlfriends,'" Drumheller said.
Drumheller said Back told him the plan one day in a prison office. The other two guards, who are both female, said Back's reasons for moving the prisoners were commonly known among guards, though officials would deny the reasons for the moves if inmates asked or complained.
Warden Barbara Wheeler called the policy a figment of the inmates' imaginations.
"With female offenders, relationships are very important, and often times when they're separated from those relationships they might perceive it as punitive," Wheeler said.
Wheeler said her employees wouldn't segregate inmates based on looks or sexual orientation, and she wouldn't condone it.
"That's like saying I want to put all the blacks in one unit and all the whites in one unit," something federal courts have ruled illegal, she said.
A dozen inmates interviewed in person or by letter contradicted Wheeler, saying there's no doubt why they were moved. Triolo said she had gone four years without getting in trouble until she shaved her shoulder-length brown locks. She soon was moved to 5D, away from her girlfriend.
Triolo and Trina O'Neal were two of the first inmates sent to 5D in the fall of 2007.
"I have been gay all my life and never have I once felt as degraded, humiliated or questioned my own sexuality, the way I look, etc., until all of this happened," O'Neal, 33, who is serving time for forgery and drug charges, wrote to the AP.
Drumheller worked at Fluvanna for two years but said he quit in August because he didn't like the inmates' treatment.
The prison declined repeated requests for an interview with Back, and the AP could not find a working home telephone number for him.
Sex — whether forced, coerced or consensual — is forbidden in prisons primarily to prevent violence and the spread of diseases.
Segregating gay inmates in men's prison has been upheld by federal courts to protect them and maintain order, though courts have ruled against total isolation or harsher conditions.
Separating women based on appearance, though, violates the Constitution's guarantees of equal protection and freedom of expression, said Helen Trainor, director of the Virginia Institutionalized Persons Project.
"Point blank, this institution is ran by homophobes, and the rules instated here are based on your sexual preference not what is right or wrong," wrote inmate Casey Lynn Toney.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
You Never Know Where You'll Find Courage: Thoughts on Dr. George Tiller
I never met Dr. George Tiller but somehow I feel I know him. I know another doctor who provides late-term abortions and I think they must be very similar - tough, independent, don't like to be told what to do and what not to do. Plain spoken. Honest. You don't provide abortions for women in their 8th or 9th month of pregnancy unless you are very clear as to what is needed and why. Because your life is in danger- so you must be sure that what you are doing is very important.
After I learned yesterday that Dr. Tiller had been murdered, I talked to people who knew him and read articles and statements about him. One thing stood out -this man did a very difficult job because he knew it needed to be done and he had the guts to do it. He didn't wait around for someone else to do it. He didn't turn away. He didn't make excuses. He met a human need.
It helps to know the stories of women who have had these late-term procedures. Imagine - carrying a fetus that was dead. or dying, or so monstrously deformed that life would be short and agonizing. Then imagine you had no alternative but to wait for the contractions, or wait for the caesarean knife. Or wait for the baby to die. I don't know what I would do- maybe I would wait, because I always hope that the worst will not happen, even when there is no hope. But I would not wish that waiting on any other woman. Maybe male politicians can. I can't.
As I continued to think about Dr. Tiller's life, I began to feel he was like Dr. King. Dr. King knew he might not live to see his dream realized - but he carried on. I think Dr. Tiller must have had similar feelings - that he was a marked man but he would carry on. He didn't just provide abortions (actually, his practice provided other services as well and I'm told he helped couples to adopt). He had a vision - that children would be born loved and wanted and that women would have reproductive freedom. He died for the ideals of freedom and of human dignity. Most important, he lived for them. In that way, he was like Martin Luther King Jr. - a person of courage.
After I learned yesterday that Dr. Tiller had been murdered, I talked to people who knew him and read articles and statements about him. One thing stood out -this man did a very difficult job because he knew it needed to be done and he had the guts to do it. He didn't wait around for someone else to do it. He didn't turn away. He didn't make excuses. He met a human need.
It helps to know the stories of women who have had these late-term procedures. Imagine - carrying a fetus that was dead. or dying, or so monstrously deformed that life would be short and agonizing. Then imagine you had no alternative but to wait for the contractions, or wait for the caesarean knife. Or wait for the baby to die. I don't know what I would do- maybe I would wait, because I always hope that the worst will not happen, even when there is no hope. But I would not wish that waiting on any other woman. Maybe male politicians can. I can't.
As I continued to think about Dr. Tiller's life, I began to feel he was like Dr. King. Dr. King knew he might not live to see his dream realized - but he carried on. I think Dr. Tiller must have had similar feelings - that he was a marked man but he would carry on. He didn't just provide abortions (actually, his practice provided other services as well and I'm told he helped couples to adopt). He had a vision - that children would be born loved and wanted and that women would have reproductive freedom. He died for the ideals of freedom and of human dignity. Most important, he lived for them. In that way, he was like Martin Luther King Jr. - a person of courage.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Bob "Let Them Eat Cake" McDonnell
Empty - gas tanks, frig. That's ok with Bob. Watch http://www.therealbobmcdonnell.com/ - stay tuned til the disclaimer - that's me (with a professional makeup job)!
How much do you make?
Like lots of women, I earn less than I should and less than men with similar responsibilities and skills. Asking nicely- or not nicely - doesn't make any difference. We need new laws to achieve pay equity. And we need Senators Webb and Warner to speak up for pay equity. They need to hear from their female constituents. Remind them that the women's vote helped elect them. What we want is simple - their co-sponsorship of the Paycheck Fairness Act, S.182.
S. 182 is fully supported by the Obama Administration and it has already passed in the House. It has 30 co-sponsors in the Senate - we need at least a dozen more before Harry Reid will bring it up for a vote on the Senate floor. The passage of this bill is a crucial step towards deterring wage discrimination and closing the persistent wage gap between men and women.
Send a personal email to the senators at http://www.capwiz.com/now/dbq/officials/ . Even if wage discrimination doesn't affect you, your daughters and grand-daughters will thank you!
S. 182 is fully supported by the Obama Administration and it has already passed in the House. It has 30 co-sponsors in the Senate - we need at least a dozen more before Harry Reid will bring it up for a vote on the Senate floor. The passage of this bill is a crucial step towards deterring wage discrimination and closing the persistent wage gap between men and women.
Send a personal email to the senators at http://www.capwiz.com/now/dbq/officials/ . Even if wage discrimination doesn't affect you, your daughters and grand-daughters will thank you!
Mike Signer's Campaign - Wow
Wow. My son, Mike, shone at the debate on Fairfax public access TV yesterday and I was so happy to spend Mother’s Day watching him.
I know that I am biased because as parents we are always proud of our children, but let me tell you why I thought Mike did so well. Despite negative attacks, he didn’t just sputter off sound bytes and talking points, but rather, with every answer he showed that he has a commanding knowledge of the issues and new ideas to move Virginia forward.
As a longtime Virginia activist and President of the Virginia National Organization for Women, I know what our Commonwealth needs right now. We need someone willing to talk to voters like adults and bring new ideas to the table. That is just what Mike demonstrated in the debate last night.
Please take 2 minutes and tell 5 friends about Mike’s campaign. He is running to turn the office of Lieutenant Governor from a placeholder to public advocate and shine a spotlight on the problems we’ve ignored for too long. This message is resonating with voters across the Commonwealth. 70% of voters are still undecided in this race, but the more people that talk to Mike, the stronger his campaign gets.
Mike’s opponents are attacking and outspending him. But, I know my son and I know that if people can hear Mike and meet Mike then they will support him. The election is just 30 days away and my son needs your help today. I hope that all the mothers out there had as wonderful a Mother’s Day as I did. Thank you for your support. Visit Mike's website to stay updated on the campaign and see how you can get involved.
I know that I am biased because as parents we are always proud of our children, but let me tell you why I thought Mike did so well. Despite negative attacks, he didn’t just sputter off sound bytes and talking points, but rather, with every answer he showed that he has a commanding knowledge of the issues and new ideas to move Virginia forward.
As a longtime Virginia activist and President of the Virginia National Organization for Women, I know what our Commonwealth needs right now. We need someone willing to talk to voters like adults and bring new ideas to the table. That is just what Mike demonstrated in the debate last night.
Please take 2 minutes and tell 5 friends about Mike’s campaign. He is running to turn the office of Lieutenant Governor from a placeholder to public advocate and shine a spotlight on the problems we’ve ignored for too long. This message is resonating with voters across the Commonwealth. 70% of voters are still undecided in this race, but the more people that talk to Mike, the stronger his campaign gets.
Mike’s opponents are attacking and outspending him. But, I know my son and I know that if people can hear Mike and meet Mike then they will support him. The election is just 30 days away and my son needs your help today. I hope that all the mothers out there had as wonderful a Mother’s Day as I did. Thank you for your support. Visit Mike's website to stay updated on the campaign and see how you can get involved.
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